It’s 6:12am CDT, I’ve had five hours of sleep and there was this soccer game I wanna tell you about.
Sweet merciful crap, they did it! The United States beat Portugal 3-2 in a game I couldn’t have even imagined to be real. The US thoroughly dominted the first half and after an O’Brien goal from a corner kick, a deflected Donovan shot for a Portugal own goal, and a perfect McBride header, we were up an incredible 3-0 in the 36th minute. A few minutes later, Beto scored off his own rebound, and it went to halftime 3-1. The second half was a nail-biter, with more Portuguese possession and a few too-close calls before, as I predicted, Agoos thoroughly crapped out and plowed in an own goal. To be fair, he played very well otherwise, as did Donovan, Beezer, (both 20 years old and keeping their cool), McBride, and John O’Brien. Brad Freidel, who’s always made me a bit nervous, was impeccable, coming off a great season with Blackburn Rovers, and he looked happier than anyone when the whistle blew after two and a half minutes of stoppage time. In any other country, I would be jumping around the streets getting drunk and the President would call a day of celebration, but I live in America, where I now have to wash out my blue hair, get on a trainload of people that aren’t even aware the World Cup is happening, and go to work.