Thursday’s WC Update

f0-fr.gif f0-uy.gif,
f0-cm.gif f0-sa.gif,
f0-sn.gif f0-dk.gif. Another morning tripleheader, but i just couldn’t do it today, I’ve got to save up my energy for England v Argentina tomorrow. I did catch part of the France v Uruguay game, and the highlights of the other matches. And what did I see? I’m a bit delusional, but let me share it with you:

f0-sn.gif f0-dk.gif Papa Bouba Diop, Papa Bouba Diop. Say it with me: Papa Bouba Diop. Sing it, like “Papa ooh maw maw.” Isn’t that fun? Well he didn’t score this time. This time it was Salif Diao. Not bad, but he’s no Papa Bouba Diop. Dinamarca scored later, on a Penalty. That makes it a 1-1 draw, and they continue to share the top of Group A.

f0-cm.gif f0-sa.gif Cameroon’s plucky “Indomitable Lions” (hey, I can’t make this stuff up!) had a harder time beating the Saudis than the Germans did, but they pulled it off, probably on the strength of their rastamaniac uniforms. Group E is anyone’s now. Well, anyone but Saudi Arabias. But props to them for having seven fewer goals scored against them this morning.

f0-fr.gif f0-uy.gif I missed Thierry Henry getting sent off, he’s so cuddly and nice that it just appalls me. But, with On-REE off, there was little reason to cheer for France (and that little reason was Viera and Wiltord, who did very little). So mighty France, who, don’t you know, won the last Cup, and the Euro Championship, and a bunch of other crap, are not so-much en fuego. The highlight of this match was the kits, Uruguay in a fantastic powder-blue and black ensemble with, get this, lace-up necks! How ’30s! Fact: Uruguay won the first World Cup, which was in, wait for it, Uruguay! France was rocking the ’70s-look Adidas kit, in white, mit der tricolore shoulder stripes. Who needs Babelfish? Oh, I guess if you were watching the game, and not Emmanuel Petit’s ass, the highlight was Uruguay’s defense and their keeper, Fabian Carini, who plays for Juventus, don’t you know. No one could be bothered to score, thus a 0-0 draw, which is almost as good as a French loss. They’re so gonna be eliminated.

Fifty commas gave their lives for this report. This is Frank DeCaro for ESPN. or something. Are you as bored with the Footballitis and the Nike-shills-on-a-boat as I am? They were awesome the first thirty times, but maybe they should have more than one version. And if I see that girl stripping on her drive from Vail to Phoenix again, I’m gonna go kick a dent in my buddy’s Golf.

Did I mention that tomorrow’s England v. Argentina? If you watch just one match of this whole tournament, blah blah blah…